There and Back Again.

Well, I am back from Thailand! 

Firstly, I'm going to digress from the main topic of this blog post because I need to share with you two things that made me laugh really really hard while I was people watching on the plane ride back. 

I always struggle with the little TV remote on any international flight. 

And apparently so did the guy two seats in front of me in the next isle. It was hilarious because I could totally relate to his plight. 

Also, the lady in the isle next to me was engrossed in the movie she was watching so she was eating without looking and she dropped a chip and it landed in her scarf. She proceeded to spend the next thirty seconds trying in vain to find the lost chip while still watching her movie. In short, it looked like this. 

Also,while I was on the plane I wrote a list of a few things that I missed from America while I was in Thailand and a few things I would miss from Thailand while in America.
 I also wrote a list of the things I learned about myself and people while there. So here it goes :)

WHAT I MISSED FROM AMERICA WHILE I WAS IN THAILAND:

 MAPQUEST. 
Because most of the time I was all like,

Vegan protein food and stuff like that. 
SPINACH. 
Jojoba oil. 
Random weird “i’m-a-health-nut-foodie” obscure food items. 
Long distance running (4 words. Stray Dogs and mosquitos.)  
My car.
 My friends.
 Wow, I somehow thought this list would be longer.  

WHAT I MISS FROM THAILAND:

My parents.
 My mom’s dog and my cats. 
The smiling people and their helpfulness and gentleness. 
Learning something new about a foreign place everyday, all day.
 Fresh fruit anywhere, anytime for less than a dollar. 
Not having a phone? 
At least because I never really looked at it unless I needed to use a wireless app or something. But I didn’t hold it in my hand when I was out and about. It stayed in my backpack and I just watched, enjoyed and, much to my mother's dismay, I didn’t charge my other little dinky phone very often so I didn’t really have that one either. Whoops. 
I love that they bow and say thank you. Or just sort of curtsey bow if we bumped into each other on accident. (So, if you see me walking around saying random Thai words, bowing, curtseying…that’s why.) And I don’t think I want to stop doing that. At least the curtsey part (It’s more like a head lowering little dip thing. It's hard to explain?)
The way people in Thailand seem to be incredibly service oriented and go out of their way to help someone.
That, sisters, best friends, daughters and mom's hold hands with each other more often.
I thought that was nice :)


The Things I Learned While in Thailand:

Compression socks are no joke. I love them. (The first time I flew to Thailand without them I’m pretty sure my ankles swelled so much I couldn’t see my ankle bones. Yikes. But I suppose sitting in the window seat of an airplane for 20 hours can do that to you. 
Appreciate easy access to spinach because it isn't readily available everywhere. Culture shock and a HALF.
I asked the Barista at one of the coffee shops I frequented how to make traditional Matcha green tea because I didn't know it didn't have to be made like a latte.
They also make coffee differently. Cool.
Simplicity and balance and living in the present is way more satisfying than pining over the future. 
That I am a full blown foodie. Albeit a health nutty foodie. 
Now this one I knew, but I still think it deserves to be mentioned. Coffee shops are one of my favorite places to be in the world. Nuff said.
That I still love Mr. Rogers.

I love people so much. I love finding the beautiful in all the imperfections of life. 
That it's not only okay for others to be imperfect but it is also okay if I am too. 
To recognize my worth and beauty as an imperfect person.
That the world is large but that doesn't mean anyone is insignificant. Ever. Anyone and everyone who lives and has lived is significant and their worlds matter.
That the beauty standards in Thailand are very similar and as unattainable as America's standards of beauty.
But despite that, I felt like people in Thailand more readily told each other they were beautiful.
To relax. 
My parents stories are out of this world. 
That you can waste time anywhere in the world. I still managed to binge watch various TV shows and watch YouTube videos more than I care to admit. That has to change.
That I will never fit into a Thai size small. But neither will my 3 year old nephew. a Thai small is SMALL. 
That I fit in with the slower moving pace of the Thai people.
That I love to teach.  I love people and being able to get to know them so I can teach them in the ways they learn best makes me so happy. Plus, I learn so much from them too. I enjoy it when they feel I am approachable enough to ask questions and know I won’t judge them etc. 
That I will forever love traveling.
I made a lot of friends from all over the world and it was so awesome to be able to talk to them about their country, culture,religion,customs etc.
That even though it was incredibly hot, a few of my friends and I planted trees and flowers for my mom and it was ridiculously fun!
(Katie, me, Sarj, Natcha, Q) :)

That, so far, all the places I’ve been in the world, early mornings are always very quiet. 
Two words. Graduation Goggles. I was beyond excited to come home 10 days before I left but as the days passed I just kept seeing so many beautiful things in Thailand and felt pretty sad to see my adventure ending.

There is a slight difference between being a quitter and being a starter. I start a lot of things. I like the anticipation of new things and the "Great Perhaps" but I need to stop starting so much and continue on with the things I love most. I need to prioritize and focus. I have started so many things that I have become pretty average at a lot of things instead of really good at one or two things. I'm a bit sad about that. I have learned the value of focus and diligence over the past few months. 

Final Words About My Trip to Thailand:

To stop asking permission to live and go where I want and do what I want.

I don't mean, disregarding others feeling etc. I will always be sensitive to the feelings of others and how my actions may affect them. That is just who I am. But as long as my intentions are good, honest, pure I will do what I want. I talked about this in more detail in this blog post :) 

I just mean, I am going to live MY life. Not the life I think I need to live because society, or anyone else says I need to live a certain way. 

To let go. This was huge for me. I hold so many things close to my heart and care too much sometimes. However, I realized some of the things I was struggling to hold on to were just too cumbersome. So I let go of them. And I feel amazing. 

 I've been pretty nomadic over the past few years but now I think I am ready to stay in one place for a while. 
To enjoy the present because it is okay to have goals and dreams for the future but not to let them suck the color and vibrance out of my Today. Because I’ve let it do that too often in my life. What I know now is that I’m always going to miss something, somewhere. I can’t let the fear that I am missing out on things in other places ruin my life. I have to learn and practice being at peace with the feeling of missing things, missing out on things, and enjoy my present. I can’t be everywhere. And I need to keep telling myself that that is okay. I can’t apparate. But I am starting to be okay with that. Hey, would you look at that.There I go “starting" again.;)