If any of you have ever traveled you may be able to relate to this next post. If you haven't traveled much this post will also be helpful in explaining my current form of Travelistis.
So, I have traveled a little bit. Usually I am really good about keeping in touch with people at home but this time, not so much.
I moved to Thailand in January and since then I have been terrible at communicating with loved ones and friends. I keep wondering why.
Maybe it is because Time here feels like this
And just when I think I've gotten a hold of it,
The truth is, being in a different country and so far away from home can make me feel like a flickering hologram. Like, Star Wars status.
Not because I feel like I am being forgotten or anything like that. But being so far from home and everything familiar can make it feel like certain things are so far away and unreachable (like my huge collection of essential oils waiting for me to return to them) (Just kidding...sort of hahaha).
Learning to eat differently, realizing that I can't rely on cold pressed castor oil and other such commodities because they simply do not have them here. Meeting tons of new people, learning new words, new rituals and manners, taxi drivers, adventures, getting lost, etc. make time fly and also it makes time feel, well, more present.
What I mean by that is, I feel less inclined to take pictures and more inclined to enjoy the moment fully as it is happening. I think less about " wow, I gotta tell [someone] this happened!" I think less about telling someone about what happened during my day and more about just enjoying my day as it goes by. I feel less inclined to use the word "happened" and more inclined to use the word "happening.'
Now you may be thinking,
Another cliche' "Live-in-the-moment blog post."
Yep. Sort of.
Yep. Sort of.
Things in Thailand just move more slowly in some ways I guess. There seems to be more of a feeling of permanence and longevity here. I guess it is just different from my time at universities in America where things just felt so transient and relationships seemed to fade so quickly if every effort to communicate, and communicate often, were not utilized. Here it seems more calm. Relationships form more slowly but more thoroughly in some cases.
Now, I have many friendships back home that I consider to be long-lasting and wonderful and that I intend to keep that way. I guess I just let go of the ones that didn't feel like that and so I became more comfortable with communicating less with everyone. Not having an iPhone can be ridiculously relaxing, albeit massively inconvenient at times. When I'm out and about it's less snapchat and more talking to other people. It's less looking down and more looking up and around. It almost feels like I've been endlessly awake for 4 years,
but when I moved to Thailand, it's like someone finally switched off the bedroom light and I could finally sleep.
So if you have traveled or are going to soon or even if you don't know when you will get to travel but you know you want to someday, just remember that you don't have to move half the world away to realize who really matters to you and what relationships are worth the effort. You don't have to tirelessly try to make those translucent friendships and relationships last forever. Give the people that love you the most and that you love the most, the most of your time and just enjoy life with them. Enjoy knowing that they, like you, put an effort into making your relationship last and that they will still be there for you when you get back from wherever you are going.
I'm not saying sever all relationships you have. I'm not suggesting you sever any, actually. Just try not to worry about them all so much. Worry about the ones that matter most and hope for the best regarding the rest.